- Place a random sculpture outside, to most it will look like a bronze turd, to your target market a beautiful work of art.
- Have a 'magicians' curtain round the entrance, this will give your customer a feeling of amazement when they walk in.
- Charge at least £5 for a liqueur, then put a service charge on it.
- Leave posh sounding cookery books piled up to buy on a table and place a premium on the signed copies. Don't forget to place a random glass vase next to them.
- All snacks must be served from jars and given out on a tiny dish. Again, don't forget the service charge.
- Place at least two candles on each table.
- Now and again, spend some time walking around loudly fluffing cushions.
- Start a traditional wood fire. It doesn't matter if your flue is inadequate, your self-important customers will accept the clouds of wood smoke as something rather chic.
Got here about half an hour before the others this evening but this may have been the fact that it is in the middle of suburbia, at one point I was expecting the road I was driving on to just....stop. unbelievably this place has to be the most expensive place we have been to in either the Richmond or Kingston pub guides, for a standard shot and mixer to be over £5 and then add a percentage charge to all food orders, including a tray of chilli bar snacks, this venue appears to think they are trading in the centre of the city not the outskirts of a suburb. Having a £16+ round when only one alcoholic drink out of 4 is being purchased is a definite deterrent from coming back here again, if you have a small island to mortgage then you probably could have this as your local, but otherwise I would recommend heading elsewhere.
|Pub facilities / features: |
|Amaretto & coke, pint of coke x2, orange juice, chilli snacks: |
Alex - 3.1
Andrew - 2.0
Dave - 3.6
Oliver - 4.0